I believed that I would be ceaslessly self-independent, confident, full of faith and somehow self-sufficient in this journey. That I can ignore any national, cultural or spatial boundaries. That I could find happiness whatever the God's will would be. Bullshit. A shameless bullshit. I am feeling lonely, isolated and in the middle of nowhere. I guess there is nothing bizarre in this 5th-month traveling condition. I miss real social life. I miss company. I miss sincere and deep conversation with a friend, I miss unserious beer-accompanied chatting during which I am getting drunk, I miss wholehearted laughing, I miss having money and affording things, I miss walking around something alike European city, I miss bars, I miss night life, I miss parks, I miss jogging, I miss dancing, I miss my own space, I miss everything.
I don’t pity myself. I know it is a phase and it will pass but I insist on sticking this note in my journal since it reveals the true, no matter ugly or nice, perspective of what I am going through. I don't know if it is a big deal or not to travel around alone with no money, no friends and no idea what is happening but I am the fool in this deal. My first destiny note from my first temple visit today, didn't make things funnier at all...
I don’t pity myself. I know it is a phase and it will pass but I insist on sticking this note in my journal since it reveals the true, no matter ugly or nice, perspective of what I am going through. I don't know if it is a big deal or not to travel around alone with no money, no friends and no idea what is happening but I am the fool in this deal. My first destiny note from my first temple visit today, didn't make things funnier at all...
